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Fashion Voyeur

People will stare, make it worth their while.

Categories: Fashion

What I Wore: To Boost My Inner Body Confidence

You know I’m fond of a swimsuit, or twenty, and this year’s vacation played host to some amazing creations.  Every year I top up my collection but for the last few years I’ve always come back to this particular favourite of mine.  Now I have to say first off that I’m actually the biggest and heaviest I’ve been since I was pregnant 11 years ago, so body confidence for me is at an all time low.  I’ve been plagued with injury through boxing and have had treatment after treatment in an attempt to fix it, followed by some cosmetic scar revision surgery, which means I’ve been out of the gym and unable to train for almost a full year.  I can’t use this as an excuse because I’ve been incredibly lazy and my usually disciplined regime has evaporated entirely only to be replaced with the lifestyle of a sloth.  I am literally the definition of the phrase “your own worst enemy”.

Anyway, our vacation rolled around and I got on the plane, even with all my extra bulk it stayed in the air and got us all the way to Mahon safely; thanks for that Jet 2.  On Day 1 I felt like a whale and didn’t want to be seen on the beach in a swimsuit.  Now I know what y’all are thinking, you might look at my pictures and think they look ok but I’ve lived with Orthorexia for a very, very long time, I recovered and took up boxing which meant again I had to live a very regimented lifestyle which actually works pretty well for me.  Today I’m 3st 6lbs heavier than I was at this time last year, and 4st heavier than I was in December 2015 which is when I was at my peak in fighting terms.  It’s hard for me to look back at that and know that I’m responsible for what I’ve done to my body.

Before I left the UK for Menorca I already knew the situation but I decided that I would try to be body positive, something that I found incredibly difficult to feel about myself, despite having the utmost admiration for women like Tess Holliday who are championing the body positive movement right now.  I felt and still do feel like there’s something off with me for feeling this way and know that I will have to rap my own ass and pull myself back from the brink of idiocy.

But we’re not here to talk about that, not yet anyway.  I’m collaborating with a big brand on a body positive campaign so I’ll tell you all about that another time.  This one is a sort of outfit post and it’s one that’s dedicated to my favourite swimsuit.  The one that makes me feel like Beyonce.  That’s because it’s the same famous Bulls swimsuit as worn by Queen Bey herself in the video for Feelin’ Myself.  It’s not technically a swimsuit, it’s a custom made leotard, it’s pretty delicate, and it’s not really designed to be worn in the ocean or pool like mine has been.

I’ve had this Bulls swimsuit for almost three years now and it’s still kicking, it’s been worn in the pool, the sea, been covered in Coca-Cola and generally more battered than it probably should have been.  It’s a powerful swimsuit in more ways than one, it makes me feel invincible and when I wear it i become the proud owner of a ‘Fuck It’ attitude.  When I didn’t feel confident this swimsuit, this small piece of fabric gave me back some self control and made me realise that it doesn’t matter what you look like on the outside if you just counter your doubt with two little words.  FUCK IT.

Yeah, it’s just a Bulls leotard.  A fucking expensive handmade one with genuine Bulls jersey trim that stretches like a bitch giving birth to quadruplets when you tug at it but it’s my leotard and I think it might be the root of my power.  Like Samson’s power was in his hair, it’s true that something external to your being can make you feel better and bring out your feisty alter ego.

Fist bump bitches.

Pixie xo

Categories: Uncategorized

Swimwear: One-Piece Heroes

As we’re now officially in holiday season, I’m turning my attention to beachwear.  Swimsuits in particular, bikinis are all over the high street and even in the local supermarket but this year like countless celebrities, I’m loving the sporty one piece.  Sleek, athletic and dual purpose when teamed with Daisy Dukes, the one piece swimsuit is seriously stylish and there are some great ones available on the great British high street.

When I’m packing for my holidays I like to take a whole load of bikinis and swimsuits and switch them out each day, or wear them as part of a daywear outfit if I’m feeling particularly lazy.  I don’t like anything that’s run of the mill, boring, or anything that you’re likely to bump into again and again on the beach so I’ve rounded up my ultimate favourites.  My top styles of one-piece are either sporty or cutaway and I love to experiment with bold colours, these ones are top of the polls for me at the moment (and I own all of them and a whole load more, so I’m speaking from personal experience):

1. My favourite swimsuit at the moment is this one from New Look £19.99, it’s cheap and cheerful and it looks just as good on the beach as it does when you’re out for a stroll wearing Daisy Dukes and a kimono.  At a shade under £20 it’s a great way to inject a little fun into your holiday wardrobe and it’s guaranteed to turn heads on the beach or by the pool.

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2. Agent Provocateur Mazzy £225.  I have this swimsuit in two different colour ways but this one is my favourite.  yes, it’s extravagant and yes, it will leave you with some pretty strange tan lines, but it’s oh so worth it because it looks uh-mazing.  Agent Provocateur make some of the best lingerie around and their swimwear is pretty awesome too, this particular one is made of pretty thick bandage style fabric and looks very ‘Herve Leger’ close up.

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3. Wildfox Couture Totally Rad 80’s Zipper one piece £118.  I love this swimsuit because it’s so kitsch, I’ve worn it a few times on vacation and each time I’ve been asked where it’s from so that’s got to be a good sign, right?  it ticks all the boxes for me: sporty, not boring and bright.

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4. Jaded London Neon Mesh Insert Swimsuit £45.  Easy choice for me, this swimsuit looks amazing on, it’s sporty and the panels are made of a strong, tight fishnet mesh which it’s actually possible to tan through.  This is one of those swimsuits I like to break out towards the end of my vacation as it looks so much better with a tan!

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5. Next up it’s another high street wonder from New Look, £19.99.  This is a black mesh panel one piece with a halter tie at the neck.  It’s a real crowd pleaser too, it looks great on any size and it always attracts compliments.  This is another one which looks great with a pair of shorts thrown over the top as day wear.

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6. ASOS Fishnet Hooded Swimsuit £35.  Let’s be honest, realistically, this swimsuit isn’t that practical – the shoulder straps are pretty wide and obviously, it has a hood.  But my oh my does it look amazing!  It’s a bit of a showstopper, everyone comments on this swimsuit.  The hood is actually sheer, it’s just fishnet without the underlay that the swimsuit has so I use it to protect my hair when lying on my front, other than that, it’s just for fun!  I often wear this with shorts or a skirt on vacation and it always makes me feel great!

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7. Luxe Lane Mauritius Bandage Swimsuit ASOS £55.  I didn’t actually by mine from ASOS as they’ve only recently started stocking Luxe Lane, I bought mine in the States and it’s a real slinky, luxury swimsuit.  It’s strong, thick fabric and it takes a bit of work to get into, but once it’s on, it looks amazing.  It’s built like a bandage dress and so sucks you in in all the right places.  Available in a few different colourways but this one has a bit of shimmer, it’s almost silver when worn.  A word of warning though, although it’s fine to swim in this one piece, the material snags easily so be careful!

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8. Honolua Sports Luxe One-Piece by Melissa Odabash £220.  This swimsuit comes in black or white, I have the black version currently but am seriously coveting the white version too.  It’s a real sporty piece, perfect for an active beach vacation, the shoulders are made of tough fishnet and the zip can be undone to change up the look.  This is another swimsuit that looks awesome with shorts as daywear.  The great thing about this particular swimsuit is that it keeps you feeling secure all day!

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9. Double Scallop Trim Swimsuit Topshop £36.  I’m breaking one of my rules with this swimsuit as it’s not at all sporty, more pretty and vintage inspired but I love it so it’s on my list!  I re-buy this swimsuit each year from Topshop and have had it in gingham, Yellow and mink and now this version, it’s a great high street piece and it looks super cute on the beach or by the pool.  The strap is detachable too so no additional tanlines.

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10. South beach Maisie Black Mesh Swimsuit ASOS £22.  This is a great example of a high street buy, from the front the neck to underarm detailing is square, this picture doesn’t show that quite so well but it just gives the piece a real sports luxe feel.  The mesh section on the waist is double layered too so it’s not so easy to snag and there’s an exposed zip at the back too which looks pretty cool. I have this in neon pink too from last season but this year it looks as though it’s only available in black. This is very similar to a Seafolly swimsuit but it’s £100 cheaper.  Bonus!

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So, if you’re heading off on vacation this year and you’ve got your itsy bitsy bikinis ready, why not stop and try a one piece?  trust me, all the cool kids are doing it…

Pixie x

People will stare, make it worth their while

Pixie Tenenbaum

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